My name is Patrick Brodeur, and I served with the U.S. NAVY from 1971 to 1991.

I was an Operations Specialist and my job specialty was Air Intercept Controller Supervisor. I controlled fighter aircraft from all countries. My last duty station was the Battleship Wisconsin BB 64 Persian Gulf War 1990 to 1991.

Both my brother and sister served in the 1960’s but not during a war conflict.I enlisted because I was tired of school and needed a break. I thought about school after the service in Architectural Drawing and planned on using the GI Bill. Second, the job market was terrible. Third, the draft was in effect at the time and I decided to have some control over which branch of service I would serve in.

The US Navy has different things that they consider the worst. In Vietnam it was mostly enemy naval gunfire. It was also the beginning of naval surface to surface, coastal missile batteries and air to surface missiles from long range bombers. Troops on the ground had it so much tougher than I. My worst thing was the missile attacks. You could dodge them most of the time in Nam. Missile Guidance systems weren’t anything like they are today. Shooting them down was very hard. In Libya during 1986, Gaddafi would lob pot shots and came pretty close. By the time the first Gulf War was going on, missile technology had increased signicantly. Missile defense was better but not perfect. So after all this bracing for a missile hit on your hands and knees knowing that you’re dead if it hits was the worst. Sinking wasn’t the only fear. The explosion could hit magazines or fuel tanks. This happened on a number of occasions. There was nowhere to go.

My greatest fear was that It felt like I couldn’t get away from all this crap. Every deployment there was some sort of conflict in the Middle East. After serving in Nam, the Cold War, a little problem with Gaddafi in 1986 and lastly the Gulf War, the accumulation of all that led to a diagnosis of PTSD 5 years after I retired.
The reception after Nam was getting spit at and being called a baby killer, the same bullshit other Nam Veterans had gone through. On my return from the Gulf War, there was a band and families waving flags. It made me sad. Nam veterans should have gotten that for their homecoming and didn’t.

The readjustment after retirement was a nightmare. I couldn’t get anything but minimum wage jobs. The actual nightmares started in February 1992, 4 months after I retired. I drank heavily to stop the nightmares until September 1994 and quit cold turkey. I had no real sleep for 3 days and then would crash from fatigue on the 4th. This went on week after week until July 1996. Then I got medication. The Veterans Employment Counselor in Medina Ohio was the one I credit saving my life. He was the one who figured out what was wrong. He was a retired Sargeant First Class. He had PTSD also. He knew the signs. I wish I could remember his name. Thank you my brother.

Financially I went through a bankruptcy, foreclosure and a repossession between 1992 and 1995, diagnosed with PTSD, and went through a divorce with an unscrupulous ex-wife. My IRS tax problems and first suicide attempt in 1996. I always thought that I would end up homeless and never recover from all this. But I am retired now. I’m married to my third wife, the love of my life. It took a long time to find her. She’s my rock. She attends group for spouses living with veterans of PTSD.

I like to build furniture, kitchens and children’s toys for Christmas that I donate to a charity.
~ Patrick Brodeur, U.S. Navy Veteran

We are very grateful to Patrick for sharing his service and story with Comes A Soldier’s Whisper where we are all connected.
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