Jim Markson and I were married for 14 years.
Neither one of us realized that he suffered from PTSD, nor did we understand that we, his family suffered as well. We divorced in 1987. PTSD and Secondary PTSD are prevalent in today’s society affecting our children of the future. You can take the soldier out of the war, but the war often remains inside the soldier.
I am the daughter of a 101st Airborne paratrooper who although physically survived the battles of Normandy, Carentan, Holland and the Battle of the Bulge during WWII, he suffered the after effects of war. I recently published my father’s wartime letters in COMES A SOLDIER’S WHISPER. Jim, after reading his ex-father-in law’s letters, expressed a deep familiarity with the sentiments written some 70 years ago. It was in that moment that I realized my father’s wartime sentiments from WWII resonates with our soldiers today.
My brother, David L. Tharp served two tours in The Gulf and suffered from PTSD. Unfortunately, no one realized that his severe depression and dramatic weight gain to over 400 pounds was PTSD related. He never went to the VA and finally agreed to seek counseling there and be assessed for PTSD. He suffered from depression, anger, and sleep apnea due to weight gain to over 450 lbs. from his 200 lb. frame. But we made the connection too late… He passed away right after his 51st birthday. I miss my darling brother every single day. www.imorial.com/davidlivingstontharp/
In Jim’s compelling interview, he says that he came from the old school of, “If it’s not broken, don’t fix it.” Although we may be dealing with broken people and in many cases, broken families who need our help and understanding, we can be whole again. For the very first time, Jim mentioned that his mother kept every letter and photograph that he sent her during his Vietnam assignment. We are now collaborating and working together on the next project, Comes A Soldier’s Whisper VIETNAM and Beyond, encompassing his letters and the stories from other Vietnam veterans with excerpts from veterans of all wars. Already, this experience has had a healing effect on our family. We hope to inspire this in other families as well.
We need to look back and understand, so that we can all move forward to healthier and happier lives. It has been said, “it takes a village to raise a child.” But it shouldn’t stop there. We can look out for each other as adults too and in the process heal together.
Reach out and thank a veteran for his service. Let’s make a difference.
Jenny Tharp La Sala
www.facebook.com/ComesASoldiersWhisper
comesasoldierswhisper.com/
twitter.com/Jennylas
Veterans Crisis Support
veteranscrisisline.net
www.operationfirstresponse.org./